Monday, October 23, 2006

History Part I

Throughout history God has worked through people to accomplish his will. In the New Testament they were called servants of Christ Jesus or slaves of the Messiah (1). This was a voluntary servant-hood, one which was not to be taken lightly (2).

Before I was born, my parents prayed that I would serve God. Throughout my life I have felt that God would use me. In my college years I struggled with this. I was pursuing a degree in computer science, thinking that it would make me successful and life would be easy. Also during this time, God was working inside me. He showed me how much I needed Him, and how much He loved me. He showed me the emptiness of self-gratification and materialism. I ended up surrendered to God and his path for my life. After this, I found I had little desire for my computer science degree, and that success would be difficult and unrewarding. I switched to study math because it was the next closest thing and I felt it would leave me with more options for wherever God would lead. At this point my future was a big question mark in my head.

My senior year was a tough one. I had a difficult breakup with a girl I was dating for nine months, and so many insecurities about my future that I didn't know where to begin. Through this time I relied heavily upon God, and spent hours in prayer, asking for direction. I was heavily involved with a christian campus organization called Chi Alpha, and also at Hillside Community Church. Through ministering in youth group and to other classmates I felt a spark inside of me. "This is what I was made to do", I thought.

During this time, I found myself frustrated that I couldn't spend more time doing ministry and in prayer because I was so busy with school and working. As I thought about the future, a 40+ hour a week job seemed like a trap. Why spend my entire life doing something of no worth? Is my life nothing more than being a slave my bills that never end? I'd rather die. Only through my time with God and sharing Him with others did I find fulfillment. I came to the conclusion that I had to go into full-time ministry, because I couldn't live any other way.

1. Romans 1:1
2. Matthew 19:21, Luke 18:28-30


About Me

My photo
Kansas City, Missouri, United States
I'm a full-time lover of Jesus. I work, learn, and pray at the International House of Prayer in Kansas City. I live simple, and seek God with all my heart.

Blog Archive